At the Heart of It Read online

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  PRAISE FOR TAWNA FENSKE THIS TIME AROUND “Fenske’s newest second-chance love story set in Portland, Oregon, [is] a special blend of comedy and suspense—readers will gladly join [Allie and Jack] on their journey to self-improvement.” —Publishers Weekly “This novel’s primary strengths are twofold: First, the reader can’t help but root for Allie, who is realistically flawed and anxious about her own failings . . . Second, the writing is deft and charming, with both characters’ narrative voices wry and self-effacing . . . This is a lovely second-chance romance (with a single-dad hero!) that will appeal to fans of Mary Kay Andrews, Jennifer Crusie, and Victoria Dahl.” —RT Book Reviews, 4 Stars NOW THAT IT’S YOU A 2017 Rita Award Finalist in the Category of Mainstream Fiction with a Central Romance “A funny, poignant reminder that the baggage our exes leave can’t stop love from moving us forward.” —Kirkus Reviews “This is a heartwarming story with well-developed, artistic characters.” —Publi

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  ALSO BY TAWNA FENSKE Stand-Alone Romantic Comedies This Time Around Now That It’s You Let It Breathe About That Fling Eat, Play, Lust (Novella) Frisky Business Believe It or Not Making Waves The Front and Center Series Marine for Hire Fiancée for Hire Best Man for Hire Protector for Hire The First Impressions Series The Fix Up The Hang Up The Hook Up The List Series The List Schultz Sisters Mysteries Getting Dumped The Great Panty Caper (Novella)

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  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, organizations, places, events, and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Text copyright © 2017 Tawna Fenske All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, or stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without express written permission of the publisher. Published by Montlake Romance, Seattle www.apub.com Amazon, the Amazon logo, and Montlake Romance are trademarks of Amazon.com, Inc., or its affiliates. ISBN-13: 9781542047302 ISBN-10: 1542047307 Cover design by PEPE nymi

  To my brother, Aaron “Russ” Fenske. For years of tasteless jokes and tasty crepes. For screening out my bad boyfriends and befriending the good ones. But mostly, for giving me a reason to write about loving brothers and all their delightful, obnoxious, endearing quirks.

  CONTENTS CHAPTER ONE CHAPTER TWO CHAPTER THREE CHAPTER FOUR CHAPTER FIVE CHAPTER SIX CHAPTER SEVEN CHAPTER EIGHT CHAPTER NINE CHAPTER TEN CHAPTER ELEVEN CHAPTER TWELVE CHAPTER THIRTEEN CHAPTER FOURTEEN CHAPTER FIFTEEN CHAPTER SIXTEEN CHAPTER SEVENTEEN CHAPTER EIGHTEEN CHAPTER NINETEEN CHAPTER TWENTY CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE EPILOGUE ACKNOWLEDGMENTS DISCUSSION QUESTIONS ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  CHAPTER ONE Kate Geary stepped onto the sunny back patio of the B&B and scanned the breakfast tables. Each held a bouquet of daisies and a noisy array of her fellow guests. As she smoothed the skirt of her ankle-length black sundress, Kate breathed in the scent of maple syrup and assessed her options. Four octogenarians discussing the merits of hip-replacement surgery as they devoured plates of German apple pancakes. Two fortysomethings bickering about the aesthetic distance and dramatic unity in the Shakespeare production they’d seen the night before. One thirtysomething guy sitting alone, munching an impressive heap of bacon while reading a children’s picture book with a pig on the cover. Kate headed for Swine Guy, figuring he was most likely to let her eat breakfast in peace. He looked up from his book as Kate approached, hitting her with the full force of the most striking eyes she’d ever seen. The color, somewhere on the palette between green and amber, reminded her of tree moss o

  CHAPTER TWO They dropped the marriage act before they got to the theater, which was fine by Kate. But they didn’t drop the “date” act, which was also fine by her, especially once the play had ended. “Here, try this.” Jonah held out a spring roll filled with shrimp and fresh cilantro, and for an instant, Kate wasn’t sure whether to take it from him or bite it out of his hand. She decided to err on the side of caution. “Thanks.” She plucked it from his fingers and took the politest bite she could manage. “Mmm, you’re right. The peanut sauce is delicious.” They’d both been hungry after the show, and found their way to a quaint little Thai restaurant near the theater. It seemed platonic enough, except that they’d been seated at a candlelit table on the patio beside Lithia Creek, with a canopy of twinkle lights strung through the trees overhead. “I love this place,” Jonah said as Kate forked up a spicy bite of eggplant from her green curry. “Especially that little mouse over there that keep

  CHAPTER THREE Jonah had several questions buzzing around in his brain and wasn’t sure which one to ask first. He decided not to choose. “Why the hell am I here?” He leveled the first question at his ex-wife before turning to face the whip-smart woman with the sleek mahogany hair and the lips he hadn’t stopped thinking about for a month. “And why are you here?” Kate flinched, and Jonah felt like an asshole. Okay, so that came out a little gruffer than he meant it to. The question—or maybe the bluntness of it?—seemed to catch Kate off guard. She opened her mouth, but no sound came out, leaving Jonah staring at those perfect, soft lips for a little too long. Way too long. Jesus. He swung his gaze back to Vivienne. “What’s going on here?” “You two know each other?” Vivienne looked genuinely perplexed, which wasn’t like her. That killed his initial theory that this was some sort of weird matchmaker scheme, which was totally something Viv would do. Helping her ex-husband find love again woul

  CHAPTER FOUR Jonah walked through the doors of the Clearwater Animal Shelter and handed Buster’s leash to the redhead wearing a mischievous smile and a nametag that said “Josslyn.” “I gave out six business cards and fielded nine requests to pet the dog,” he reported as he moved past his sister behind the counter. Jossy grinned and shoved a shock of curly red hair behind one ear. “How many requests to pet you?” Jonah grunted. “Two.” He rummaged under the counter for his T-shirt, feeling oddly self-conscious. It’s not like he wasn’t used to walking bare chested around Alki Park, but it always left him feeling like an aging frat boy. Fall was on the way, and with it the colder weather. He felt relieved. It meant he could graduate to a skin-tight thermal shirt for the winter. “Here,” Jossy said, shoving the T-shirt into his hand. “You left it in the back room again. I swear you’d lose your balls if they weren’t stapled on.” “And if I didn’t have women checking them for me every time they t

  CHAPTER FIVE Kate appeared on the doorstep of Cornucopia Books precisely at eight just as a woman with a nose ring and a bright-pink pixie cut was flipping the door sign from Open to Closed. Kate’s surprise must have registered, because the woman smiled and pushed the door open. “Are you Kate?” “That’s me.” “Come on in. I’m Beth. The boss man’s in the Cat Café. He’s elbow deep in some project in the kitchen, so he asked me to let you in.” “Oh. Thank you.” Kate ran her hands down the front of her navy striped T-shirt dress and wondered if she should have dressed down more. Maybe skipped the blazer or gone for casual-casual instead of business-casual. “Come on,” Beth said. “It’s right this way.” The young woman led her across rustic wood floors through a spacious lobby filled with racks of postcards and reading glasses and bright mugs printed with phrases like Never judge a book by its movie, and My book smells better than your tablet. They continued past a barista station with a gleamin

  CHAPTER SIX With her heels clicking on the black maple floor, Kate strode across the front of the hotel conference room, handing out printed packets. She kept her eyes averted from Jonah’s, remembering Amy’s words about the chemistry between them. It wasn’t true, obviously. Even so, she couldn’t afford for it to look obvious to any of the studio
reps and network execs who’d shown up for today’s pre-production meeting. “What’s this?” Jonah asked as Kate handed him his packet, and she fought the urge to strangle him. Clearly he didn’t share her intent to avoid direct conversation between them. Kate let her gaze skim the room, skipping eye contact with Jonah in favor of directing her response to the dozen other people in the room. “These packets contain basic information about the pilot episode,” she said. “Shot lists, intro and outro materials, that sort of thing.” “Are the patients in there, too?” On the opposite side of the conference table, Viv accepted her packet from Amy and began f

  CHAPTER SEVEN Kate saw Jonah hesitate as she stood there on his doorstep, feeling the glare of his porch light beating down on her like a spotlight. She took a deep breath, wondering if she should have come here at all. If she should have kept texting or maybe sent an e-mail. Then he stepped aside and waved her into his home, and Kate released the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. “Come on in,” he said. “I was just helping the cat get settled.” Kate looked at Marilyn, who was standing on the back of a tan leather sofa with her eyebrows arched in silent judgment. “Hey, kitty,” she said, stepping over to stroke the cat’s ears. “I’m glad he decided to keep you.” “Me, too,” Jonah said, and Kate thought she caught a note of embarrassment in his voice. “You’re her hero.” “Please,” he muttered. “I’m her butler.” “Same thing to a cat.” Jonah shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at her, probably wondering what the hell she was doing in his living room. “I’d offer you a beer,

  CHAPTER EIGHT When Jonah pulled into Viv’s driveway for the first day of filming, he was right on time. It went against his inner caveman’s desire to piss her off by showing up late, which must mean he was maturing. That he was meeting his goal of being his own man instead of basing his actions around Viv’s expectations. The fact that you’re even thinking like this means you’ve got a long way to go. Jonah sighed as he made his way up the walk. He didn’t know why being around her made him feel like a surly teenager. She’d been nothing but cordial. Well, cordial with a side of nagging bossiness, judging from the eight billion text messages she’d sent over the past few days. “Hello, Jonah,” his ex-wife said as she greeted him at the door wearing black leggings and some sort of flowy white shirt. Her feet were bare, of course, and her smile was guarded but genuine. That was something. She’d also called him Jonah instead of Joe, which he appreciated. “Hey, there.” He stepped over the thresh

  CHAPTER NINE Filming with Viv and Jonah wrapped up early at three. Combined with the B-roll they’d shot over the course of the last week, they were off to a solid start. Their first sit-down with Viv and Jonah had just enough edge to give the production team some juicy sound bites for promotion. Sam and Elena—the couple they’d chosen for the pilot episode—came off as sincere, sweet, troubled, and just a little bit weird, which was the perfect combination for television. Sam had complained about Elena spending thousands on shoes, and Elena had countered with a jab about Sam’s taste for expensive cigars, but they’d held hands without prompting for most of the conversation. It was going well, all things considered. Mostly. She watched as Jonah hustled out the door, giving courtesy farewells to the crew while looking a bit like a man fleeing a house fire. Kate watched his car pull out of the driveway as she stood at the window coiling a cord for the cameraman. “Don’t you think so, Kate?” S

  CHAPTER TEN Kate took a sip of her vodka soda and tried not to make eye contact with anyone. Not the woman strutting past in a purple corset and fishnet leggings. Not the guy in latex pants and a red denim vest dotted with metal studs. Not the leather-clad octogenarians Kate felt fairly certain used to play in her grandmother’s bridge club. “Ma’am? Are you looking for someone?” Kate’s pulse kicked up, and she turned to watch Jonah slide onto the barstool beside her. She’d never been so glad to see anyone in her entire life. “Jonah! Thank God you’re here. I was hoping they wouldn’t give you any trouble at the door.” “That was a first for me.” He grinned. “Having my name on a guest list at a members-only sex club.” Something about that grin dissolved the tension in her shoulders, and Kate began to relax. “Thanks so much for coming. I didn’t want to leave without getting a feel for the place, but—” “You didn’t want anyone getting to feel you?” “Exactly.” “Quite the crowd they have here.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN All the blood drained from Jonah’s head as he stood in the open doorway and stared at the unexpected visitor. Footsteps thudded behind him, and he turned to see Kate running into the room with her shirt untucked and her feet still bare. “Amy! What a nice surprise! I thought we were meeting on-set this morning.” Jonah—who’d been doing his best to keep his lower half hidden behind the door—took a step back as Amy pushed her way into the room. She surveyed him from head to toe and gave a cluck of approval. “Oh, very nice.” She grinned. “No wonder everyone wants to get your shirt off.” Jonah did an inward grimace but ordered himself not to look down at his boxers. If his dick was hanging out the fly, there was no point drawing attention to it. “Amy,” he said. “Nice to see you again.” Kate had somehow managed to tuck in her shirt while Amy ogled him. She stepped forward now, doing her best to divert the assistant producer’s attention. “What brings you by so early, Aim?” Amy g

  CHAPTER TWELVE The next few days of filming passed in a blur for Jonah. Kate behaved like the consummate professional, orchestrating detailed filming schedules and pulling cast members aside for on-the-fly interviews (which Jonah had learned to call “OTFs” so the crew members didn’t look at him like a dumbass). He tried not to take it personally that Kate never handled his OTFs, always deferring them to Amy or one of the other folks on set. This is what they’d agreed, after all. They both had to pretend nothing had happened between them. He couldn’t help wishing Kate weren’t so good at it. A couple of times he tried texting her after hours. Once about a beer he thought she’d like, and another time with some silly message about bubble bath. He also messaged her about the filming schedule at Jossy’s shelter. That was the only text she answered right away. He knew that was for the best. She was just sticking with what they’d agreed, and he was the idiot who thought maybe they could still

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN Kate rang Jonah’s doorbell with her elbow. She had a bag of takeout Thai in one hand, a six-pack of IPA in the other, and her heart in her throat. “Hey there!” Jonah threw open the door and grinned at her, then stepped aside to usher her in. “Looks like you found a way to change clothes.” “Yeah. There was a Victoria’s Secret right by the Thai place, so I ran in and grabbed sweatpants and flip-flops.” “I like it,” he said, and Kate’s cheeks grew warm. Maybe she shouldn’t have mentioned Victoria’s Secret. And maybe she shouldn’t have bought the cute bra-and-panty set she’d grabbed on impulse, reassuring herself it was only because her black undies might show beneath the new white sweatpants. None of it had anything to do with Jonah. “Denial is a form of self-abuse,” Viv chanted in her head. “You’re lying to yourself instead of someone else.” Kate gritted her teeth and gripped her purchases a little tighter. “Let me take that.” Jonah grabbed the six-pack from her hand and

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN Kate stared at the paperwork spread out across her hotel bed, too dumbfounded to comprehend the words dotting the pages like blood spatter. She looked up to see Amy watching her with a nervous expression. “Say something,” Amy urged. “What are you thinking?” Kate swallowed, trying to get her bearings. “So the divorce papers were never officially filed,” she said. “Which means the divorce never happened.” “Right.” Amy nodded like a teacher responding to a pupil prone to hysteric outbursts. “As soon as I uncovered all this, I called Viv.” “What?” Kate knotted her fingers in the bedspread and ordered herself to keep breathing. “You called Viv about this?” Amy reached across the bed and laid a hand on Kate’s arm. “No, not like that,” she said. “I didn’t tell her what I found. I just asked a few questions about the divorce paperwork. She knows I’ve been work
ing on all the due diligence. The background checks and legal stuff.” “Right. I’m sorry, of course.” “I wanted to see i

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN “That’s a wrap!” Kate called with a glance at her watch. It was only four, which was a bit early to stop shooting, but they were starting to lose their light. Besides, the temperature had been dropping all afternoon, reminding Kate of the challenges involved with outdoor shoots. “Think we got what we need?” Amy trotted up beside her, blowing on her gloved hands. “I’m pretty confident,” Kate said. “That last sequence with Elena running into Sam’s arms on the sidewalk looked perfect.” “She totally nailed that.” Amy grinned and glanced back toward the waterfront walkway, where the happy couple were still twined in each other’s arms. “I love the way he picked her up and spun her around. He did that without prompting.” “Quintessential wrap shot,” Kate agreed, already picturing it in her mind. They could dub in some voiceovers with the couple talking about their life together after the show. The camera would zoom in on the autumn leaves swirling around their ankles and Elena’

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN “Fucking lawyers,” Kate muttered as she pulled the rental car into her parking space at the hotel. She switched off the engine, but made no move to get out yet. “I’m really sorry,” Amy said. “I don’t know how that happened.” Kate turned to see Amy frowning in the passenger seat. Her blond curls looked like she’d pulled Viv’s Zen garden rake through them, and the twin creases between her brows seemed deeper than normal. “It’s not your fault,” Kate said. “We both agreed that involving legal was the right way to go. There’s no way you could have predicted Rick would go straight to Chase.” Amy shook her head and looked down at her lap. “I thought with client privilege—” “We’re not the client,” she said. “Chase is. Well, Chase and the network. Not us.” Amy sighed and looked up again. “I don’t know why, but I guess I expected a little bit of decency.” “I don’t know why either. You’ve been in this business long enough to know better.” Amy snorted. “Reality TV isn’t the place t